My
daughter posted on Facebook about a “glass shattering” moment where she
realized that the accepted term for a toilet paper roll was not actually
“toot-toot”. It was in our house as she
grew up as it was in mine, but apparently not in other homes. I told her I was sorry not to tell her sooner
but it made me think of all the things we’ve created as family group-speak and
brought into our daily lexicon.
I
have my own that came from my family of origin as well. We always called the back of the station
wagon the “way back”. It was just what
we called it. We never thought about
anyone else calling it that; it was just a family thing that our friends and
family accepted. Of course they had to
accept a lot of expressions from my parents that were different from the norm
in sixties Phoenix. You see, my parents
migrated to Arizona – Buckeye, Arizona to be exact – in the mid-50’s from small
town New England. Sight unseen they
packed up 2 little girls aged 2 and 4 and moved to the desert. I cannot even imagine the culture shock but
that’s another story for another time.
We
grew up with the colloquialisms of my parents from thousands of miles
away. I am sure that by the time I came
along 3 years later they had toned down a lot of those. I know my father, teaching in rural Buckeye,
had to in order to be understood by his students. However, my mother stayed at home and
socialized with the other women who were also mostly transplants. Growing up I just accepted the strange things
my folks said and rolled with them. I
was used to hearing my family – especially when we traveled back east for
visits - talking about calling for a
“jitney” instead of a bus, “tonic” was soda and saying of “ayuh” instead of yes
or just as acknowledgement to something being said. We knew these were “New England” things and
seldom used them once we got back west.
Perhaps
the frequency of our visits back to New Hampshire helped figure out the
public/private difference in words and phrases. We’ll never know but it makes
me feel that perhaps we sheltered our children and allowed the family
group-speak too willingly.
When
my son was a toddler our rescued basset hound puppy got excited and would run
around the house to burn off steam. The
first time we saw it he exclaimed “Look – him’s a cow!” Now mind you the dog was female and we never
really figured out if he misspoke cow instead of horse (the running and all) or
just what he meant. Nevertheless, it
became the family phrase for when the dogs got worked up and dashed around the
house as fast as a basset can dash.
Then
when the daughter was a little girl she would invariably take a sip of each and
every drink I ever had. During one long
hot summer I presented the family with a rant about leaving my iced tea alone! A while later the daughter sidled up to my iced
tea glass, double-handed and took it to her lips as I looked on in horror. At that point she smiled and said “onk, onk,
onk”. We all laughed and realized she
was giving voice to the sound we made when drinking and busting my chops to
boot. It became a family word for a sip of a drink, spread to
my siblings and my friends as well as theirs. "Can I have an onk of that?" It became accepted.
I
have to admit as being as guilty as anyone to using phrases not commonly
used. I frequently heard my kids calling
things that were wrong “Babylon” as I often did – a Rastafarian phrase. Hell, my kids grew up knowing their father
was born in Germany but not the town name because I had invented “IckySprickyDicky”
for the town. My husband invented the
term “warffle” to describe swallowing something the wrong way. We had many items from an inherited hope
chest becoming “the stump” and snorkels being called “spits”. The Farlows have their share of group-speak.
However,
now that my son has had a child I feel I need to inform them and anyone else
who might hear it my mother’s use of the word cunnin’ or cunning to describe
a baby/toddler. It was accepted in my
family but I doubt that even my husband (whose family has their own set of
group-speak) knows and few outside our family have heard it. Just lately, as I took pictures of my
granddaughter to my mother for her to show her friends in her retirement facility
she exclaimed as she looked at my sweet granddaughter “oh she’s just so
cunnin’!!” It made me realize that we had a potential glass-shatter moment here
too.
My
mother used this phrase when talking to and about babies and toddlers for as
long as I can remember. We accepted it growing up and I admit I used it at
times. To go for “Yankee slang” my
mother dropped the “g” on the end of the word changing it from cunning to cunnin’. I guess that’s pretty daring for a small town
New Englander. I am sure that I heard my
grandmother say it when talking of my baby brother. I think that perhaps my mother’s grandmother
used the phrase as did the generations of Yankee women before her. It certainly seems old enough when you look
it up.
cun·ning
ˈkəniNG/
adjective
adjective: cunning; comparative adjective: cunninger;
superlative adjective: cunningest
1.
having or showing skill in achieving one's ends by deceit or
evasion.
"a cunning look came into his eyes"
synonyms:
|
"a cunning scheme"
|
||
antonyms:
|
|||
ingenious.
"plants have evolved cunning defenses"
2.
North American
attractive; quaint.
"the baby will look cunning in that pink print"
I
don’t know if my mother ever used the word in front of my kids or not or if I
ever explained the meaning/origin of it to them if she did and they didn’t
understand. I think now is the time
before they are confused by the colloquialism uttered from my almost 88 year
old mother.. It not a common adjective
for babies and I think it’s probably a use of the word which is dying out. That’s sad to think that a word I grew up
hearing and knowing is going the way of the rotary phone.
I just know that my
little granddaughter is extemely
cunnin’.
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